Learning to Surf

“We can learn to work with [life’s challenges], understand them, find meaning in them, make critical choices, and use their energies to grow in strength, wisdom, and compassion…You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”

Life is big. I feel like I’ve been saying this a lot lately ;). The swells of change challenge my mental balance every day. From the local and global political events to the surprising personal challenges (sudden increase in business rent, changes to regulations for teaching, health challenges of my clients/students), even the new ideas in treatment options can be overwhelming. I struggle to find equanimity.

It is human nature to seek out predictability. Our brains are wired to be efficient (since they are the organ that uses the most of our body’s energy). It is the most efficient use of energy for the brain to have shortcuts – habits, find patterns, even stereotypes and binary judgements are ways to save mental energy. An unfortunate side effect of this efficiency is that our predictions can be inaccurate or miss subtle details. I’d win a gold medal if jumping to conclusions was a sport ;)

Luckily, I have tools to help me cultivate balance. My daily yoga and meditation are “intentional pause and observe” practices. Even the efforts of intentional exercise, playing in nature, and conscious recovery (massage, sauna) help ground me. I have never surfed, but the image of a surfer keeps coming to mind.     

I first learned about the perspective of “surfing” the waves of life from meditation teacher Jon Kabat-Zinn - see his book Wherever You Go, There You Are (p.30). The same way a surfer knows that you cannot fight off the coming swells of waves, each of us experiences many life challenges that can be out of our control.

This message is that when the waves of life hit, you must learn to accept what is, bring your awareness to the present, and move forward skillfully from a place of grounded intention. Mindfulness meditation practice invites us to pause the momentum of life and our reactions, recognize the thoughts/emotions that come up when faced with the challenge, and reconnect to the present moment (instead of getting caught in the tsunami of “what ifs” or “it should be different”).  So, in this moment, I pause. I focus on my breath or my body. I cultivate space to notice the thoughts and emotions that rise up. Even when I get caught up, panicked, overwhelmed by what I don’t know, or taken away by thoughts the practice helps me notice and come back into the moment.

I invite you to identify something that helps you “surf” the waves of life. Make some time today to be purposeful in whatever practice helps you most. Take care of yourself.